Lonely
I can't stand feeling alone, or not included. It leaves me feeling hard broken. Maybe it’s in my head. This feeling of abandonment. But people do things without me, and I can’t help but wonder why I wasn’t invited. Like what the fuck did I do! And I don’t ask about it because I don’t want to sound desperate but it hurts. I keep telling myself I need to get used to people leaving me. But I can’t just be ok with being alone. It’s an empty hole where a part of me should be. I’ve given them apart of me and in return they’ve stolen it leaving me hollow. I want to have friends and trust them. I want to have someone to talk to. But what’s the point if they’re leave, taking my secrets, and my trust with them. I can’t do this. It hurts by myself and it hurts with people, and there’s no remedy. Something I do to see if people actually care is I stop texting them. Stop being the first person to start a conversation, and make plans. If they respond to this then maybe they care. And if they